Month: September 2020

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Why I started this blog…

I’m Deanne, a 44 year old Australian living in Canada for the past 18 years. Mom to two teenage girls, a widow, a narcissistic abuse survivor (that’s a long story) business owner, entrepreneur, jewelry maker, mom to nine furbabies, an alpaca shearer, living the country lifestyle. I’ve survived more than most people can believe and I’ve learned how to laugh and dance through it all and bring positivity to others.

When my estranged mentally ill (NPD/BPD) husband committed suicide, I helped his girlfriend (one of four at the same time) who I’d never met before, navigate through the web of darkness he had created for her by sharing my learning experiences. Now that she’s on the other side of it (almost a year later) she’s encouraged me to help others through a blog. My philosophy is that everything is going to be okay if you’re okay within yourself, learning how to be strong enough so that nothing stops you from living the life you desire. I have a really great life and I want to share that alongside my past experiences and hopefully impact my readers in a positive way.

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The Start of My New Adventure

I sit at my desk, my hands on the keyboard of my laptop ready to type. I’m looking around my office, at my daughter’s years of artwork on the wall, my messy desk littered with empty coffee cups, my monthly budget posted on the wall (as if that’s going to keep me from impulse buying) along with the daily affirmations I wrote out years ago to get me through the day, the hour, sometimes minutes.

I take a wine gum from the pack that I opened a few nights ago when I was feeling stressed out about life and look at my dogs curled up at my feet.

This is the start of a new journey for me but where to start? My 20+ years experiences being married to a man with BPD/NPD? Infidelity? Divorce? C-PTSD? Co-Parenting with a No-contact spouse? A spouse’s suicide? Helping your kids grieve the death of their dad? Crisis counseling for children and teens? Starting over? The struggles of being a single mom? Financial stress? Dating? Running a business?…….Phew

You see, I experienced ALL of these things and I’m still dealing with much of it and struggling to cope some days.

It seems like for some lucky few, they know where they’ll be in 5 years, but quite frankly, most days I don’t know what I’m doing tomorrow. I know where I’d like to be – preferably on an island with a cocktail in my hand ha ha…. but seriously, I know I have some insights to share; it’s just working out which of those insights are worthy of being shared with the world, with you, the reader. Right now I’m figuring it out as I go, and on those days when things make sense, I’ll be sharing them with you, hopefully over a glass of wine.

Enjoy.

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Aussie Kid meets the Wild Prairies

Hi, my name is Deanne Watson. Here’s a little backstory on how I built my jewelry making business.

As well as being a single mom to 2 girls, Rose who is 18 and Lily, a precocious 14 year old; I’m also mom to 5 dogs including 2 Great Pyrenees – Douglas and Aurora (be sure to follow on their instagram page @douglasandaurora) who are currently four years old and weigh in at around 100 pounds (gulp). Olive is our 11 year old “Momma” Cockapoo, the smallest of the gang but the most mature. Then there’s Oreo, our Cocker-Papillon – can you guess her colors? ha ha. We recently added Red, a mini retriever/corgi mix who was a “foster fail” on my part but very happy about that!

We have 4 cats, and it seems a revolving door of coming and going and lots of asking “are you in or out?” Let’s just say it’s a cute and furry mad house.

Over the last few years I added six alpacas to the zoo, but unfortunately due to divorce and having to downsize, I chose to sell them to a nearby farm.

So obviously, with so many animals, we have acreage – 4.5 beautiful acres in Beausejour, Manitoba – smack bang in the center of Canada.

Now many years ago, when my girls were still toddlers I found myself feeling a little housebound, isolated and in need of a creative outlet. Why you ask?

Well, If you’ve ever experienced a winter here, you know they’re long – and when I say long – boy, do I mean long!! 6 months of minus 30-40 degrees celcius cold and snow compared with very mild, warm and sunny winters where I grew up in Brisbane, Australia. Never having seen snow until coming to Canada was to say the least, a challenge.

When a friend took me to my first wire wrapping class, I was hooked and never looked back. What started out as a hobby, quickly became an obsession and I soon realized that if I wanted to continue, I’d better come up with a way to pay for all these supplies I was continually buying or my poor husband would have a heart attack!

I started selling at markets and hosting jewelry parties and by the time I opened up my Etsy shop I had somewhat figured out my niche style. It has changed a little over the years, but it’s always centered around wire wrapping.

When I get a little free time (I know, what’s that right? especially when you’re a mom), I like to play around with some new ideas. Usually it’s something simple – an everyday piece that I would enjoy wearing or I could picture my customers wearing.

I’m very grateful for this life, one where I’m working from my home in the country – being creative – present for my kids and tribe of animals, and just generally feeling excited to wake everyday and make beautiful, meaningful items for my customers.

Thanks for taking the time to get to know me a little better!

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A little more about me…

Born and raised in sunny Brisbane, Australia to lower middle class christian parents, my life was seemingly normal. I didn’t realize that other parents didn’t fight like cats and dogs, didn’t drink too much, didn’t wake their kids up in the middle of the night screaming and being physically abusive. We weren’t even told not to talk about it, we just knew… don’t ever talk about it.

If only I had known what I know now….

I was determined to never be like them, right? We all thought somehow we could escape unscathed, break the cycle – not even realizing there’s a cycle to begin with. We had no tools, no way of navigating, no way of knowing what we didn’t know, praying to God that we could somehow make it different once we grew up. And then we grew up and did the same damn thing. Just different, but in the end the same. Because we were never taught another way.

Flash forward and I’m sitting here, 40 years later, so much wiser but almost wishing I was ignorant of all the challenges I’ve been through. But if I hadn’t made this arduous journey, would I be me? The warrior women I’m so proud to be, victorious at having conquered so much, motivator to others, fierce protector of my children, fierce and fiery, joyous and thriving?

I think not. The things that I’ve achieved, by sheer grit, have made me who I am. An entrepreneur, a business woman, a lover, a fighter, a protector of those who cannot protect themselves, a crazy, hot mess of a women who makes no apologies and who invites all who dare into her world of wonder, to embrace all that can be; because that is where real joy is found; in this crazy dance called life.